Everyone Communicates, Few Connect

What the Most Effective People Do Differently

HarperCollins Leadership, 2010

15 min read

10 take-aways

Audio & text

What's inside?

John C. Maxwell has a fine time sharing stories and quotes that will help you build better connections.

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Editorial Rating

Qualities

Applicable
Concrete Examples
For Beginners

Recommendation

To learn how to connect well with others, imitate a connection superstar: leadership development expert John C. Maxwell. When he posted a preliminary version of this book on his blog, 100,000 people viewed it, and many offered comments on how to make it better. Maxwell has sold more than 18 million books and his company has taught leadership skills to more than five million people. He offers this book’s simple principles and its very abundant quotations, anecdotes and stories to explain how to build relationships with other people in many settings. Without being preachy – though he is a preacher – he provides an intelligent, purposeful philosophy about connection. Maxwell’s sensible counsel – focus on others, help them, smile – is not earth shattering, but no one could dispute its basic verity. If the book sometimes seems just to skip merrily from one great story to another, that’s part of its charm – and it all adds up to advice that will improve your ability to link with other people. The trick is to put these examples into practice and Maxwell explains how to do that. getAbstract recommends his book to all those who want to improve their public speaking skills and interpersonal connections.

Summary

To Connect, You Must Communicate

How do you know when you’ve connected well with other people? They go out of their way for you. They speak favorably about you. They bond with you emotionally and communicate openly. They trust you. They exhibit positive energy toward you and enjoy being around you. Connecting meaningfully with others pays big dividends. People with warm connections face less conflict and enjoy their relationships more. However, forming such links with others requires cutting through the barrage of signals and messages that bombard everyone daily. That means becoming an effective communicator, a skill you can teach yourself – and you’ll be glad you learned it.

Warm connections depend on recognizing and acknowledging other people’s value. Take the focus off yourself and place it on others. Put your ego aside. Learn to work well with others. To connect with people, talk with them and center the conversation on their concerns, not yours. Try to build one-on-one relationships where some “90% of all connecting occurs.” Perfect your skills in this basic area. Then learn to connect with the members of groups and, finally, with people in an audience. This isn...

About the Author

John C. Maxwell is an evangelical Christian pastor, speaker and author, who has sold more than 18 million books in more than 50 languages. He is the author of Developing the Leader Within You and The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, among many other books.

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H. R. 4 years ago

Hi getabstract. I like your summary style. I have read many summaries and found tjem very applicable and helpful. I would like to suggest please add dating and relationship book titles as well. Lots of people are looking for these summaries as getabstract currently contains only business books
- 4 years ago
  
  Hello Hussainrazz, Thank you for your comment. I've forwarded your feedback to our Editorial team.
m. m. 5 years ago

can i get chapter wise?
- 5 years ago
  
  Hello Muhammed, We apologize for any inconvenience, however getAbstract summarizes and compresses the knowledge of the entire book. We do not summarize by chapters.
N. F. 1 decade ago

Very good abstract. Highly recommend it! In this age of social media. I think in this era people don't really know how to communicate anymore.